All my life I have ?wittled or transposed letters in words. When I studied the paiano as a child, I played from a book of simple melodies called "Juvenile Classics". Of course, I always referred to it as "Juneville Classics". I was still doing this as a soldier in W.W.II. When I was on a pass in London, I noticed that on many street corners there was an establishment with a sign that said "Brasserie". I transposed a letter, exclaiming to myself, "The woemn of England surely need a lot of uplift!" I had, in fact, observed that many were big-breasted, and thus as they approached, they seemed more eager to meet you than you were to meet them! (And I soon learned that a brasserie is a small cafe or beer parlor, smaller than a pub.)
When I was a studen at Tucson High, I helped my friend Lawrence Rose get elected as Student Body President by putting this notice on every blackboard:
"LAWRENCE SAT ON A TACK!
LAWRENCE ROSE! -- VOTE!"
Our algebra teacher signed our yearbooks with "ALWAYS TRY 2B2!"
Later, in my own English classes, we had fun with unique treatment of words: EMBARGO spelled backward is "O, GRAB ME!" REWARDER spelled backward is REDRAWER. Here's a Scotch telegram I put on the board:
BRUISES HURT ERASED AFFORD ERETOR ANALYSIS TOO INFECTIOUS DEAD (OVER)
In 1985, when ?Fay and I visited Lancaster Country, Pennsylvania, with our friends from Delaware, we loved the Amish people with their interesting dress, speech, and customs. The men wore wide-brimmed black hats and big Biblical beards. The women dressed in long black or brown skirts and quaint, old-fashioned bonnets. We stopped at a couple of farms, neat and prosperous, but they had no electricity, nor any gasoline-driven vehicles or farm machinery. It was fascinating to see oxen, horse, man, wind, and water power used to the fullest extent. Lots of windmills, flumes, waterfalls, and waterwheels.
The Amish drove into town in covered, black buggies, their beautifully-groomed horses trotting proudly down the pavement. We had a tremendous Amish family-style lunch at a farm-restaurant appropriately named "Good and Plenty." "FRABJOUS" slabs of hot apple pie a la mode--and we bought some jars of jams, jellies, and apple butter, "to take home along". The Amish have a delightful way of turning sentences upside down: "Throw the dog over the fence a bone!"
The brilliant quilts on display in many shops in Intercourse, Pennsylvania, were stunning--and quite expensive. This picturesque town was the locale for several scenes in the suspense film "Witness", starring Harrison Ford. We couldn't buy a quilt, but we did get a bright, quilted beanbag for our three-year old grandson, Mark.
When we gave it to him on Mother's day, 1985, in San Francisco, I told him our daughter-in-law Sheila to look at the tag and see where it was made. Shen she saw that it came from Intercourse, Pennsylvania, she turned three shades of pink and red! Calmly , I told her, "Now, Sheila, to most clean-minded people, Intercourse is a respectable word for business dealings--tade, barter, exhange, buying and selling."
"?h!" she said, but she glared at me as though I had tricked her, even on Mother's Day!
Curtiss H. Anderson
(BRUCE IS HURT! HE RACED A FORD. HE WRECKED HER! AND ALICE IS TOO! IN FACT, SHE'S DEAD!)