Lawrence Hosken: Frivolity: Poetry: The Warm and Fuzzy Thread

Date: Fri, 3 May 1996

One day, a lot of people wrote some poems, following an e-mail thread. Let's see how things unfolded, shall we?

From: Lauren Haughey-Fletcher

I took 2 allergy pills about an hour ago. Now I am so 
high that the city of Hayward actually looks pretty, 
and this Yuban brand coffee tastes really yummy.

lauren
From: William O'Neal

Someone make a limerick out of this.

Wil
From: Paul Du Bois

sneeze louder than ron
happy pills swim in stomach
wow, yuban tastes good!
From: Jimmy Lefkowitz

no no no no no no, that's a haiku
that was not a limerick you fool
get back to work
you stupid jerk
or I'll pour some yuban down your throat and put you on a train to hayward.

jimmy
From: Lawrence Hosken

Lauren (not a member of clergy)
took pills for her allurrgy
  She grew quite woozy;
  About coffee not choosy;
And soon changed her name to Sergei

-Larry H.
From: David Loftesness

Show Lauren the way to go home,
She's tired and she needs to go to bed,
She took an allergy pill about an hour ago
And it went straight to her head.

To Hayward she may roam,
To cups of Yuban foam,
This limerick sucks,
O Savior of Ducks,
So make your own damn sinusoidal po'm.

dl
From: Lawrence Hosken

There once was a woman named Lauren.
Allergies she was abhorrin'
  To get rid of her ills,
  She swallowed some pills,
and now her thoughts they are soarin'.

-Larry H.
From: Lawrence Hosken

Hayward (and ain't it a pity)
Is quite an unsightly city.
  But with medication
  And hallucination.
Hayward can be kind of pretty.

-Larry "I'm not sure I can stop" H.
From: William O'Neal

I feel personally responsible for this thread.  And with the power vested 
in me by the Universal Life Church and Morgan and hereby end it.

This thread started out quite crude.
Wil's fault!  They screamed what a dude!
  His boredom it thwarts
  The progress of Geoworks
Let's all get to work before noon.

Wil
From: Jennifer O'Neal

> I took 2 allergy pills about an hour ago. 
> Now I am so high that the city of Hayward
> actually looks pretty, and this Yuban brand 
> coffee tastes really yummy.

do what you got to..
From: Lawrence Hosken

Allergic?  Do what you got to.
Two pills will dispell the achoo.
  To clear up your sin-
  uses, wash them with brine,
which really clears up the snot, too.

-Larry H.

(The day before, I'd posted a sinusitus remedy that involved sucking saltwater in through the nose and spitting it out through the mouth. Eww!)

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