It is March and the lovely EnigMarch people have challenged puzzle designers to write a puzzle inspired by today's word: "board".
Oh no! The USA clown President Trump (egged on by his buffoonish adviser Elon Musk) wants to run America like a business. Alas, he's a dimwit, and all of his businesses failed. Well … his businesses kept failing until he became president, then his businesses made a lot of money "selling" to shady investors, i.e., accepting bribes. You might ask: How did this loser get a reputation as a smart businessman?
"The Apprentice" was a reality TV show from 2004 to 2017. Contestants competed at business-themed challenges. A business expert would judge their efforts, uh, in theory. When the producers were first putting their show together, they contacted many successful businesspeople, asking them to appear on the show as the expert; all the successful businesspeople said "no." And thus, instead of a business expert, they got Donald Trump. Did you ever read producer Bill Pruitt's article on Trump's incompetence? (Here's an archive link in case you can't read the Slate article.) It's just kind of sad; until you remember that this guy became president, then it's tragic. Unfortunately, the producers did a good job of covering for Trump's stupidity. With enough fancy music and strategic edits, Trump seemed impressive!
At the end of each show episode, contestants would go to a "boardroom." Those contestants who'd done worst at the challenge would have to face Trump. He'd "fire" (eliminate) one contestant with the creative catchphrase "You're fired!" With that in mind, can you get from model train to a by the following steps, eliminating a letter each time and then anagramming?
| Machine on the Tech Nickel Plate: | m o d e l t r a i n |
| Might stick their head in a mouth (ew): | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ |
| How to get a command line on a Mac: | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ |
| Not animal or vegetable: | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ |
| Envelope, for example: | _ _ _ _ _ _ |
| Disney Princess or Prospero's wispy pal: | _ _ _ _ _ |
| Tech Nickel Plate ____road: | _ _ _ _ |
| The Greatest: Muhammad ___: | _ _ _ |
| "Weird __" Yankovic: | _ _ |
| Indefinite article: | a |
Solution, rot-13'd:
zbqry genva / Znpuvar ba gur Grpu Avpxry Cyngr yvba gnzre / Zvtug fgvpx gurve urnq va n zbhgu, rj? grezvany / Ubj gb trg n pbzznaq yvar ba n Znp zvareny / Abg navzny be irtrgnoyr znvyre / Rairybcr, sbe rknzcyr nevry / Qvfarl Cevaprff be Nevry'f jvfcl cny envy / Grpu Avpxry Cyngr ____ebnq nyv / Gur Terngrfg: Zhunzznq ___ ny / "Jrveq __" Lnaxbivp n / Vaqrsvavgr negvpyr
